Eurovision is yet again upon us and I couldn’t be more thrilled!
Here are the 2012 Awards!
The Best song shame-it’s-never-gonna-win-but-can-I-have-his-phone-number-pretty-please Award goes to Roman Lob with this brilliant song by Jamie Cullum.
The One Night Stand Award goes to…. Wait a minute! It’s a tie! Between the entire band of Litesound representing Belarus and Tooji representing Norway
The I-can’t-believe-they’ve-not-been-shot-dead-yet Award goes to… (drum rolls) Jedward, who else?
The Most accurate representation of their country Award goes to Russia with the Babushka group named something unpronounceable! ( Buranovskiye Babushki) – Now, picture them in an over-crowded tube stations, carrying heavy wicker baskets and bashing people’s head in so they can get in first in the train!
The When -is-someone-gonna-look-at-a-map- and- realise-Israel- is-not-in-Europe! Award goes to Liran Notik representing Israel…. (Granted, he is super hot but that does not make him european! – Sorry, I’m a suker for accuracy. Let’s change the contest name then and call it Whomeverwannajoinvision)
The Best Video Clip Award goes to France (mainly cos’ Jean-Paul Gaultier was in charge! – But if they bring those boys on stage, I know I’ll be voting for!)
The They’re-not-even-trying Award goes to Latvia… (I have nothing else to say on the matter – the song says it all!)
The Bow-ties-are-cool Award goes to Kurt Calleja for Malta
The I’m-not-gay-how-many-times-do-I-have-to-tell-you Award goes to Anri Jokhadze for Georgia
The I-know-I-shouldn’t-but-I-love-it Award goes to Gréta Salome and Jonsi for Iceland
MAY THE CHEESIEST ONE WIN!